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But from the first minute I talked to Ronni, I knew I was in good hands.She was willing to meet with me for a consultation so she could answer all of my questions.After all, there are plenty of fatal complications that can occur in labor, like placental abruption, which affects women who have not had C-sections.Even women who have never had previous abdominal surgery are vulnerable to uterine ruptures.I emailed one who was recommended by a friend and meanwhile continued to read more about the benefits of vaginal delivery as opposed to C-sections.When I posed more questions to my doctors though, I became confused and overwhelmed.

He explained that many female obstetricians prefer to schedule Cesareans for their own births rather than endure the pain of vaginal labor.He also went into a story about women in third-world countries who labor for so many hours, their bladders collapse and urine shoots out of their vaginas.On my next visit, the female OB (the one who convinced me to have an early epidural) recounted how the doctors and nurses on call gulp down bottles of Pepto-Bismol when they have a VBAC patient in labor because they’re so afraid that something will go wrong.For weeks I carried the weight of my decision in my chest, fretting about whether I was succumbing to unnecessary risks, whether I was being selfish in wanting to avoid surgery and somehow putting my life before my baby’s.The only way to face this labor, I decided, was to hire a doula, someone who would personally assist me before, during, and after delivery.